What if all my trying only gets me close, but not quite. Have you ever tried so hard that your bones remember the weight of the effort, even when your mind has already begun to forget? I have. There are nights when I lie awake and think about all the versions of myself I’ve given [...]
You really do get over it on a random day Sometimes, some things don’t happen the way you think they will. There’s no grand moment, no fireworks in your chest, no sudden burst of clarity. You just wake up one day, maybe on a Tuesday morning or a Saturday afternoon, and something feels … different. Not [...]
But Not Always for the Right Reasons. You haven’t heard from them in months. Maybe even years. You spent countless nights wondering if they ever thought about you, if they ever regretted leaving. And just when you’ve finally learned how to live without them — ding. “Hey, how are you?” Like nothing happened. Like they didn’t disappear [...]
When a man says “I need some time”, you can hand him a watch. When he says “I’m not ready for a serious relationship”, you should believe him. When he says “I’m not sure”, instead of being uncertain about where this is going, this should give you absolute certainty that it’s not going anywhere. You [...]
If there is one thing that I take pride in about myself and everyone who is struggling just like me, it is the fact that we try. We try to get out of bed even when it pulls us stronger than gravity. We try to choose the best outfit for the day even if all [...]
Love hurts is one of the assumptions no one likes, but we all take for granted. But why does love hurt? Why is the one thing that, poetically speaking, has the power to transcend time and space, causing so much pain? Because it’s not love we’re speaking about, it’s attachment. Some people will probably hate [...]
Love — be it romantic, self, or otherwise — is rascally. A few undiligent weeks, and you can lose yourself, parts of you breaking off in pieces as the sun rises and sets. You can’t go on cruise control, ignoring the shifts, and starting and stopping that the cultivation of love requires. You must be [...]
Stop pretending like it doesn’t hurt. It hurt, doesn't it? It seems like you’re getting overwhelmed again and need to go back to the starting point. You might have to furrow your brow and clench your hand to hold back the sudden nausea, followed by feelings of guilt because it feels like you can’t finish [...]
Inhale, exhale. If it’s not enough, do it once more. This is my mantra every time I feel a meltdown coming on. When I was a kid, crying was the key to solving almost all my problems. Hungry? Just cry, and food would appear. Tired? Cry and Mama would sing me a lullaby until I [...]
Baby, would I still be your lover? I’ve been loved for false versions of myself. In return, I’ve been despised for the things I told people through honesty. But it’s far, far more fulfilling, because it’s tiring, it’s tiring to act like a robot or the friendly-face template that smiles at every single person when [...]
Perfectly Imperfect 